Murphy's War.

Murphy joined the Irish Navy in 1969 ,just in time for the Troubles to break out in Ulster,when certain of the Citizens had their bellies full of institutionalised discrimination and took up arms against a Statelet and an Empire that revelled in persecuting them and the Provisional IRA was born.
Like the vast bulk of the populace in the Republic I sat on the ditch and was too cowardly to help my fellow Irishmen out,taking my lead from successive Governments in the Republic.
Anyhow the logo of the Provos was not dissimilar to that displayed by the Irish Navy as Murphy found out  when he was sent to a secret Royal Navy base in England to participate in deep sea training in facilities not available in Ireland at the time.
Himself and a handful of other Irish trainees were unmercifully bullied and intimidated by the so called hosts because the were Irish ,because thy were members of a mickey mouse Navy ,because of the similarity of the logos and finally because of the killing of their compatriots by the Paddy terrorists---THEIR WORDS.
It finally came to a head when the prime bully and his acolytes planted a cardboard box containing a ticking clock marked as a bomb under Murphy's bed and found it hilarious.
Enough was enough.
Soon afterwards Murph found himself alongside the prime bully at the bottom of a deep water tank with deep sea diving equipment attached.
As part of the exercise to preserve oxygen they were instructed to doze off .Seemingly you use less of it when dozing than when awake.
And off they dozed ,save Murphy.
When chief bully was sound asleep with legs wide apart,Murph grabbed them .twisted them and squeezed as hard as possible.Yer man coughed off his mask and air nozzle ,gulped a belly full of water and surfaced too quick to the surface thereby suffering the bends.
So I am told.
No more bullying.